The Creative Child

What does your Creative Child look like? What does it mean to be Creative?

I recently spent the weekend with a courageous group of creative women who have big ideas. Women who want to change the world. Women who will change the world by making a difference in their every day.

During a panel discussion, some of these women were asked to describe a time they’d been ‘boxed in’. As I listened to their stories, I was reminded of what the Protective Behaviours Program calls Unwritten Rules. These are a set of beliefs and assumptions we hold about how people should behave and look. Most of the time we don’t even realise we are following these rules, let alone dare to challenge them.

Questioning Everything

The thing is, Creatives have a natural tendency to challenge Unwritten Rules, which is a good thing. However, when the challenge comes from a child, we don’t see it as a good thing. Instead of seeing it for what it is, a genuine question of how we can do better, we unwittingly quash this innate strength. After all, what would a child know?

These are the warrior children, the ones who have big dreams, the courage to question beliefs that are not helpful, the potential to make a difference, to stand out, to stand up, to stand for something.

They see purple elephants and unicorns. They have friends we can’t see. Their toys are real, with names and personalities, long after the average child has grown out of the age of wonder. In fact, these children don’t grow out of wonder, they grow up in it.

They ask Why, repeatedly, until the answer satisfies purpose and meaning. All too often these children are very quickly put back in their box, left with the belief that they’re not enough, their ideas are not valid. They’re seen as troublemakers, they have an attitude problem (notice how it’s rarely the adults who have the attitude problem?). These children learn that it’s not okay to speak out, to speak up, to stand for something.

Creative Thinkers

And then they grow up, into Creative adults. I don’t mean Creative as in the ability to create a work of art through words, music or pictures. The arts are one expression of creativity, however what makes someone a Creative is not what they create but how they think. A Creative is passionate, sensitive, purpose driven and sees the world in a very different way. They are boys and girls. They are women and men.

And it’s this ability to see the world in a different way which can be both a blessing and a curse.

A blessing for the World when Creatives are released to pursue their dream and make a difference.

A curse for the Creative when the World tells us we don’t belong unless we conform.

Sometimes, Creatives get a second chance. Someone whispers to her that it’s okay to be herself, so she timidly steps out of the box, little by little and starts to do what she is destined to do. She starts to make a difference, starts to stand up, stand for, stand out.

Stand out. Is it really OK to stand out? To be seen and heard? Briefly she tests the waters and revels in the freedom. Until the next person comes along to tell her she needs to get back in her box.

Don’t Judge Appearances

Back to the panel discussion. Some of the women are young, attractive, dress well and love to surround themselves with beautiful things. They’re often not taken seriously. What would they know about hardship and suffering? They’re entitled princesses, who wouldn’t be able to survive if faced with real life and hardship and they certainly aren’t genuine about doing anything that would create meaningful change in the world, they wouldn’t want to get their hands dirty and besides, all they really care about is their looks.

Then there are the older women, the ones who are too old, therefore not beautiful enough to make a difference or have a voice. Notice how women are either too beautiful or not beautiful enough? Too old or not old enough? Older women don’t really have much to offer do they? Doesn’t a woman’s brain begin to stop functioning around the same time as her uterus ceases to be of any use? An older woman must dress a certain way and her hair should be short and grey (or white) and she definitely shouldn’t wear make up. Any of that nonsense and she’s ‘Mutton dressed as Lamb’ (because women are meat).

Yes, I’m being facetious, but this is what I hear when my creative brain challenges assumptions and rules.

Courage to Make a Difference

What if we all had the courage to challenge the rules? To not be threatened when a child asks us if it has to be done that way? To tell a child that it’s OK to dream and that her dreams are worthy and that she can make a difference? To look beyond age, gender, looks, education and socio-economic status and catch part of the vision within. Instead of seeing age, beauty, gender, weird, different or anything else, you would instead see warriors who are not afraid to get their hands dirty, to be vulnerable, persecuted or to suffer physically and emotionally if it meant bringing about change and justice. You would see warriors who bring beauty, joy, healing and meaningful change into this world.

I saw this and more in each of the women on that panel. It’s not hard to see, they don’t try and hide their passion, the world just needs to remove the scales from its collective eyes to see it. Many of these Creatives have grown up believing their gift was a curse. All of them are showing great courage as they finally allow the little girl inside to have her voice. They’ve found the courage to allow their dream to be louder than the critical voices and they’re making a meaningful difference in their everyday. They all embody the true definition of beauty!

These stories are echoed in the lives of Creatives all over the world, men and women who were once little boys and little girls who somewhere along the way began to believe what was spoken to them and over them. As we exercise the courage to break free from the shackles of words, we can be a blessing to the world. Our ideas are worthy, they are good. As Creatives we think differently, we see the world differently and we question. Many don’t like our questions, others are annoyed because we have so many. But if we don’t ask the questions how will anything change? How will anything better be created? How will we put an end to injustice? How will the world become more beautiful?

The Child Within

I started this post by asking what your Creative Warrior Child looks like. Whether this child is one you have care of or one that lives inside of you, the importance of your words and attitudes towards this child cannot be underestimated. Remember, this child is very sensitive. She knows she is different and different is not respected in our world, another fact she is keenly aware of. She needs to know above anything else that the world needs her voice.

I have referred to She, because she is the little girl who lives in me. I hope that you can take the time to stop and think and take a good look at the little girl or boy who lives in you. The one who was silenced many years ago. The one who is fearful but who, with the right words, will have the courage to step out. The world needs that child. The world needs her to stand up, to stand for, to stand out.

To stand out. Yes, it’s safe to stand out. It’s safe to be different, to think differently, to dance to the beat of your own drum. Tell her that. She needs to hear that. More than once.